Crying Rape for Regret

Regarding the view that women ‘cry rape’ when they regret having had sex, let’s concede for a moment that that’s true. The concession begs the question: why do so many women regret having sex?

Even if it turned out to be a mediocre experience—if the man wasn’t very good at it, due to lack of skill or lack of maturity (in terms of wanting the woman to have an orgasm too)—one would hardly cry rape.

Perhaps the woman got pregnant. If she didn’t want to get pregnant, one would think she’d either be using contraception or she’d trust the man to wear a condom. So either the contraception didn’t work or the man didn’t wear a condom (or took it off part way through) or he promised to ‘pull out’ before ejaculation (not knowing that semen can get into a woman’s vagina even before ejaculation).

However, my guess is that the woman thought they were going to make love, and it turned out he was just fucking her. Worse, she realized (once she realized it was just a fuck) that she’d get a bad rep, to put it mildly: her name would circulated, the guy would post humiliating comments, maybe even images, on social media, etc., etc., etc. It makes perfect sense: as long as women who consent to sex are considered sluts, they’ll be tempted to cry rape—non-consent.

So men, you don’t want to be charged with rape? Don’t have sex the woman will regret: make it great sex; use a condom; and don’t consider the woman a slut because she wanted it.

excerpt from Pornography and Civil Rights, MacKinnon/Dworkin

Pornography [also] engenders sex discrimination. By making a public spectacle and a public celebration of the worthlessness of women, by valuing women as sluts, by defining women according to our availability for sexual use, pornography makes all women’s social worthlessness into a public standard. Do you think such a being is likely to become Chairman of the Board? Vice President of the United States? Would you hire a “cunt” to represent you? Perform surgery on you? Run your university? Edit your broadcast? (p.48, emphasis mine)

Worth repeating.

Great Post at “Not Sorry Feminism”

Great post at “Not Sorry Feminism” re men cleared of rape because the woman was “too masculine” to be attractive.

 

And here’s something else that would never happen to a man …

Jass has also set up a tumblr page for additions to Jane Smith’s “And here’s something else that would never happen to a man…”

https://jass-richards.tumblr.com/

Jane Smith’s Translation Dictionary

An interesting thing about the novel (A philosopher, a psychologist, and an extraterrestrial walk into a chocolate bar…) is that one of the characters, Jane Smith, starts a ‘translation dictionary’ and the author, Jass Richards, has set up a tumblr page for people to add entries.  Cool.

https://jassrichards.tumblr.com/

 

 

Just out! A radfem novel!

JUST OUT from Lacuna!

A philosopher, a psychologist, and an extraterrestrial walk into a chocolate bar…  a novel by Jass Richards

It’s kinda an extended argument for radical feminism.  And very funny.

Here’s the blurb:

When a self-appointed independent activist and her office-temp-with-a-doctorate buddy embark on a quest for a chocolate bar (a bar that serves not alcohol, but chocolate – in all its deliciously decadent forms), they pick up a hitchhiking extraterrestrial who’s stopped on Earth to ask for directions.  Trying to explain Earl (Earth), confronting everyday sexism (rather like bashing your head against a jellyfish), and committing assorted outrageous acts and everyday rebellions, they help ‘X’ find the information she needs to get back home – and go with her – to become chocolate bartenders.

Available in print at Lacuna, AmazonBarnes and Noble, Chapters, and wherever you buy your books online.

Also available in KindleKobo, as a NookBook, and as an iBook.

Making Fun of Rapists

Big words confuse them.  They think ‘No’ means ‘Yes’.

They have no sense of direction.  They confuse running away with running toward.    

They have a questionable understanding of basic biology.  They think they need sexual intercourse.  (Like, what, if they can’t stick their dick into some woman’s vagina, they’ll die?  Wouldn’t that be nice.)

They also seem to think pregnancy is under a woman’s voluntary control.           (Wouldn’t that be nice.)

They don’t seem to understand the difference between fiction and reality: they think porn movies are documentaries.

And they’re completely incapable of logical thinking.  For example, if it’s no big deal, why are they forcing us?

And they’re so thin-skinned, aren’t they?  When someone politely expresses a lack of interest in having sex with them, they completely lose their shit.

 

 

A great point about legalizing prostitution

“There is no other ‘job’ where a 13-year-old with zero experience can be sold for 100 times the price what a 23-year-old with ten years experience is sold.”  Samantha Berg

 

https://www.genderberg.com/phpNuke/modules.php?name=FAQ&myfaq=yes&id_cat=2&categories=

 

And here’s something else that would never happen to a man …

So this guy in our neighborhood has early Alzheimers and dizzy spells.  He’s looking for a babysitter (his word) and someone to cook for him and do his cleaning so he doesn’t have to go into a home.  And he asked me.

I have no experience babysitting.  And absolutely no aptitude for it.

Yes, I do my own cooking and cleaning, but I have no interest in it, at all, and do as little as possible.

So why did he ask me?  Because I’m a middle-aged woman.  Apparently that’s what middle-aged women do, that’s what we are, that’s what we’re for.

Yes, I’ve been friendly with him, stopping to chat or at least wave when I walk by (as a result of which he once asked me if I like sex and whether I’m any good at it—apparently that’s another thing women do, are, are for), but I doubt that friendliness on the part of a man would have indicated that he’s available for babysitting, cooking, or cleaning (or sex).

I’ve got three degrees, I used to be a philosophy instructor, I’ve published several books, and I’m currently making a living as a freelancer.  Would a man with such credentials be asked to be someone’s babysitter and do their cooking and cleaning?

Ah, but this guy doesn’t know I’m all that.  And that’s also telling.  If I were man who has lived in this neighborhood (small, rural) for twenty-five years, everyone would likely know all of that about me.  But I don’t go around announcing these things, and no one’s ever asked.  Because they just assume I’m—well, none of that.  After all, I’m just a middle-aged woman.

P.S. – Spread the word – I invite women to add their own “And here’s something else that would never happen to a man” entries via the comments function.  I’d love for this post to turn into a blog sort of like ‘What is it like to be a woman in philosophy?’

How to Make a Man Grow Up

I was recently surprised to discover that in the U.S., men are required by law to register for the “selective service system”.

Only men.  I thought women were allowed in their military now.

And required.  I didn’t think they had ‘the draft’ anymore.

When I expressed my surprise, hoping to engage someone in conversation, the guy in line behind me (I was in a U.S. post office, where the brochures reminding men of their duty were prominently displayed) said he agreed that it should be mandatory to serve for two years: it makes ‘em ‘grow up’.

Hm.  How does teaching someone how to kill make a person grow up?  That is, what’s mature about learning how to kill?  What’s mature about actually killing?

Of course, being in the military is not just about killing.  Arguably.  But what’s mature about not being pressured to conform, to obey orders?

Sure, the forced routine, of physical exercise and psychological effort, might become a habit.  And that’s a good thing.  A grown-up thing.  But there are other, far better, ways to achieve that same result.

And sure, the presumed altruism—you’re serving their country, life’s not all about you—is good, mature.  But again, is killing someone for others really the best example of altruism we can put before young men?  Young men who need to grow up?

It seems to me the selective service system is a bad way to fix a bunch of other bad ways.

The question we have to ask is how do boys get to eighteen without growing up?

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