I almost stopped watching this movie because ‘men are selfish stupid dicks’ is so very tiresome, but the women at the dinner scene (about 20 minutes in) made me keep watching. 

Even so, men.  I can’t believe how clueless they are.  Do they really not know the difference between a vasectomy and castration?  Do they really think it’s their orgasm that causes pregnancy and not the presence of even the tiniest bit of seminal fluid?  Do they really not know that childbirth causes severe, often permanent, injury?  Do they think women’s screams are just … hysterical?  Exaggeration?  (I swear, every thirteen-year-old should have to watch a film of childbirth.  ‘Oh but that’ll ruin sex for me; every time I even think of having sex, I’ll think of that.’  Duh.) 

So. Recommended viewing for men. (Free on Plex.)

Watched The Mad Whale yesterday. The description was something like ‘Lunatics at a women’s asylum put on a performance of Moby Dick‘. I was hoping to see an expose of historical treatment of women vis-a-vis madness and was not disappointed. But I was delighted, further, to see a couple other unexpected (shame on me!) exposes and some female heroism. (It’s free on Plex.)

“Women need to recognize that their husband refusing to do any childcare, cleaning, or cooking is not just a result of ‘cultural differences’, it’s a result of him being an arsehole.”

“Living the Life of the Mind: General Strike? What About a Gendered Strike!?” Charlotte Knowles, The Philosophers’ Magazine 98 (2022)

“The free speech of men silences the free speech of women.”

from Feminism Unmodified (1987)

repost from Dead Wild Roses

“… highest population density” (p57, Climate Wars, Harald Welzer) should read “… highest frequency of men fucking women”.

“a dramatic rise in population figures” (p63, ditto) should read “a dramatic rise in men fucking women”.

I see this again and again … This stork/cabbage patch theory of the origin of life.It’s like men have a complete disconnect between putting their sperm into women’s vaginas and creating human beings.

Is it because they don’t personally experience, physically or emotionally or (to the same extent) financially, pregnancy and childbirth?  But what about raising children?  Ditto (to the same extent)?  But there’s a lot of other stuff they don’t personally experience but can imagine, anticipate, quite well.

“Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits.” 

Tina Fey

from Ejaculate Responsibly: A whole new way to think about abortion, Gabrielle Blair

[P]regnancy and abortion are not ‘a woman’s issue.’  men don’t play a minor or supporting role in pregnancy.  Men’s lifelong continual fertility is the central driving force behind all unwanted pregnancies.  [All.]  p8

We treat ejaculation as something that happens at random, that is unintentional, that is impossible to anticipate or predict.  p17

Women—  [Actually, just read the whole of chapter 4: Ovulation is Involuntary, Ejaculation is not.]  p19

We don’t mind if women suffer, as long as it makes things easier for men.  [the title of chapter 10.]  p48

When men choose to have condom-less sex, they are putting a woman’s body, health, social status, job, economic status, relationships, and even her life, at risk in order to experience a few minutes of slightly more pleasure. … Would men really choose a few moments of slightly more pleasure over risking a woman’s whole life? [italics mine]  [Yes.  Apparently.]  p57

If Person One knows they have an STI and transmits it to their partner, Person Two, in many states that’s a crime, and Person One can be prosecuted by the state.  Additionally, Person Two can bring a civil suit against Person One.  If your bodily fluids have the potential to harm your partner [and she’s made an incontestable case that pregnancy has that potential] [actually, she establishes that harm is a certainty], it’s your responsibility to ensure they don’t.  p70

If you have a son, his sperm can “infect” any woman he has sex with.  … Pregnancy and childbirth are known to kill women.  Pregnancy and childbirth are highly likely to leave permanent scars and cause future health problems …  Unplanned pregnancy and childbirth can have a significant negative impact on the quality of life for the future child and their parents.    A man’s sperm can cause a huge amount of damage.  p71

Don’t ask: Why don’t women pick better men?  Instead, ask: Why are there so many abusive men?  And: Why don’t we teach men not to abuse?  p87   [Though I’d also ask: Why do they have to be taught not to abuse?]

“Patriarchy teaches us that sex, for women is a giveaway, while for men it is a takeaway.  She saves herself, gives herself to the right one, and then her virginity is lost.  In this equation, there is nothing in sex that’s for her to take.  Whereas he takes and scores and there is nothing in sex for him to give.  When her mind is programmed to give, she struggles to say ‘no’.  When his mind is programmed to take, he struggles to accept ‘no’.”  (from The 8th List of Shit That Made Me a Feminist, Farida D.)   p87

I’m trying to imagine how our culture would react if men with children peed themselves every time they  jumped or sneezed [a common ‘side-effect’ of pregnancy and childbirth].  I don’t think the medical community would be okay with that.  I think the issue would be solved by now.  p93

I think it’s safe to say that if sex were as risky for men as it is for women—with an unwanted pregnancy potentially leading to loss of social status, loss of career, a disruption of their education, physical disability, death, and the permanent responsibility for another human—that men would insist on having a choice in the matter.  [Yeah.  Why I wrote What Happened to Tom.]  p96

If a man ejaculates irresponsibly and causes an unwanted pregnancy, he faces zero consequences.  He can walk away at any time, and our current culture doesn’t really do much (or anything?) to discourage it.  [Yeah.  Given p91-95, impregnating should be consider premeditated aggravated assault, the full damages of which to be determined after childbirth, and putting male DNA on record at birth would enable charges to be confirmed.]   p107

Our society is set up to protect men from the consequences of their own actions  [like we do for children].   Our laws and policies could not be better designed to protect men who abandon the pregnancies they cause.  p109  [see the full list of evidence on p109-110]

Sperm should be considered a dangerous bodily fluid that can cause pain, a lifetime of disruption and even death for some.  Sperm can create a person.  Sperm can kill a person.  Sperm cause pregnancy, and pregnancy and childbirth can result in physical and mental health issues for women, as well as negative impacts to her social status, job status, and financial status.  p112